I have asked both male and females to be friends. It’s been interesting. I’ve had a few say, “No, I’m only interested in dating, so I’m out if you’re not dating.” Others have said, “I’m in a committed relationship, but I’d love to be friends.” (BTW, I love honesty and loyalty, so I knew I picked a good friend in these cases). A few females said yes but want to spend our time working out. That seems to be a common theme with new female friends, working out or talking about working out. And some females say “Yes, what do you want to do?”, or “I’ve always wanted to do this”. Or even, “Thank you for reaching out, I’ve been wanting to make new friends and I wasn’t sure how.”
Then…I’ve had some wonderful new friendships budding. Paint and sip nights, listening to music. I’m going to the Van Gough exhibit. I’m planning a winter trip to snow and ice skate. I’ve been invited to go make pottery.
I think, all in all, finding friends isn’t the same. It can be awkward. The brain can offer all kinds of thoughts like…
“What if they don’t like me?”
“What if I don’t fit in?”
“Can I really trust these people?”
“What did he/she/they mean about that?”
“Why did he/she/they get upset about that?!”
“What if he/she/they think I’m hitting on them?”
All the self-doubt can be there. For me, they WERE there. But without trying, I wouldn’t have ever known. And I will always be able to laugh at myself when I think of the mistakes or awkward run-ins. I will take them all for a few good friends I enjoy being around who have high vibrations and heartfelt conversations. People who truly care about each other…they are worth all of this and more.
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